This blog had slipped to my lowest priority this past week. But hopefully I can cram as many rom-com references and weightlifting info into one post as possible before I get distracted again.

Ordinarily the only search terms used to find this blog are Die Hard quotes, however, this week someone found it by searching for ‘ask a girl out on a date’. Obviously, this is the worst place to research that query. I can probably teach you how to ask a girl out on a date using text messages. You’re on your own otherwise. I wonder how it went for that poor soul. For actual relationship advice try Fort Lauderdale Sex in Relationships by Ashley Jarvis or You lost Him at Hello by Jess McCann.

Both of those blogs are written more for females but they are rich with legit advice. If you want to learn how to sabotage and torpedo your personal relationships then STAY RIGHT HERE!

Which brings me to the point of todays post (totally buried the lede). I sabotaged my most recent relationship last Saturday. I was suppose to meet up with a girl and her friends at a bar and instead I stayed at a club with my roommate, his girlfriend, and his girlfriend’s friend. I did this because I became completely enamored with her friend. I would feel worse if it was an actual date I was blowing off instead of just going out to a bar.

Have you ever seen French Kiss? It felt like that. No, not Kevin Kline’s character. More like Timothy Hutton’s character. When he goes to Paris and doesn’t come home to his fiance because he is drunk in love with a french woman. Only instead of going to Paris, I went to Eden, and instead of a French girl it was a Brazilian girl, and instead of a fiance it was a girl I went on one or two dates with. OTHERWISE TOTALLY SIMILAR.

Anyways, I would rather be like Timothy Hutton’s character in French Kiss than hitting on a jailbait Natalie Portman as Timothy Hutton does in Beautiful Girls. So there’s that.

I have been hanging out with her this week and it has felt like a Hall & Oates song. Press Play.

Honestly. Honestly. HONESTLY? I kind of felt like I have just been going through the motions until this last week. But there is one hitch… she is leaving the country in 4 days.

/hatemylifehatemylifehatemylifehatemylifehatemylife
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It’s fine.

You can probably stop playing that Hall & Oates song now.

Workout Logs

Tuesday I squatted 275 3×5. Overhead pressed 155 3×3. But it might have been more like a push press. Deadlifted 315 x3 and 345 x1. RDLs at 165 3×5. I have not been eating enough food. My weight is going down and it’s not helping things. I think I basically did a good morning on one of the 5th reps of squats and that is certainly no bueno.

Friday I worked up to 275 x3 and then backed off and did 225 x8. Benched 195 3×5 but its bullshit. Spotter was stabilizing the weight. I feel like I might be getting weaker. I need to eat a lot more calories and protein and less empty calories (read: beer).

I also need to be squatting 3 times a week but I feel way too sore to do this every other day. So I need to do light squats in between days that I go heavy until my legs are conditioned.

The primary reason I am training is for softball season. The first year I played on the Carolina Softball team I hit 1 homerun. Last year I hit 4 homeruns. This year I want to hit a dinger in every game. It’s a restricted bat league so when we play with fences you pretty much need to be strong. When we play on the mall you just need to hit it over the outfielders head. I hit the top of the fence last year. WARNING TRACK POWER. I need to be squatting, power cleaning, and deadlifting a lot heavier to get these softballs over the fence.

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